What Are the Signs that Your Adopted Child Needs Mental Health Care?
Most adopted children navigate the struggles of growing up and survive adolescence relatively unscathed, but getting there can be a stressful process for both the child and the parents. You are learning how to parent in a trauma-informed way to help your child find healing from the abuse, neglect, or other painful experiences in your child’s history. But there might still be niggling doubts. Are you are doing “enough?” Is there something “bigger” at play in your child’s developmental process?
Every parent worries about whether her child is “okay,” but often, adoptive parents worry specifically about the impact of trauma on their child’s mental health – both short- and long-term. It’s a valid worry – there can be significant mental health struggles that come of abuse, neglect, and other trauma, but there are also very typical behaviors that concern adoptive parents simply because the parents focus heavily on the child’s trauma history.
Adolescence seems to be the most troubling season in which parents are trying to figure out what is going on with their adopted child. Indeed, it’s hard to parse out what is adoption-related or even maladjusted behavior and what is typical adolescence angst. All the boundary-pushing, identity formation, and, of course, hormones and mood swings can turn a parent’s world upside down with fear. So, what should parents look for when they are concerned about their child’s mental health?
What Are the Signs That Your Adopted Child Needs Mental Health Care?
If your child has just two or three of the following signs, his struggle is likely a temporary one. However, if your child manifests more than a few of these symptoms, or if signs are persistent or increase in frequency or intensity, seek a therapist or counselor. And as always, trust your instinct: if you are concerned, err on the side of seeking help sooner rather than later.
These signs are found in the article, Psychological Issues Faced by Adopted Children.
- Sudden changes in appetite – overeating or skipping food altogether
- Changes in sleep habits – sleeping too much or too little
- Inexplicable decline grades at school
- Uncharacteristic evasiveness, sullenness, irritability
- Poor hygiene
- Increased anxiety
- Social isolation or a significant change in friend groups (for example, to a less desirable peer group)
- Loss of interest in typically favorite hobbies or activities
- Repetitive behaviors beyond the toddler years – repetitive activities, rocking back and forth, head-banging
- Violent outbursts or antisocial behavior – stealing, setting fires, harming animals
- Developmental delays
- Self-injury, suicidal talk or thoughts
- Substance abuse
It’s also wise to consider a consult with your child’s doctor. Start by ruling out the potential for a physical issue that might cause some of these struggles. Your pediatrician might also have valuable resources for finding the right help for your child.
Find an Adoption Therapist
When seeking mental health care for your adopted child, look for a therapist who is “adoption competent.” That means that the therapist has had specialized training in the added layers that adoption and trauma bring to your child’s journey. It’s often helpful to find one that will work with your child and also incorporate your whole family for care as these issues impact all of you. Creating a Family has a wealth of resources to help you find an adoption-informed therapist.
With the right care and interventions, your adopted child can find healing and coping skills to manage the struggles he is facing. These tools will go with him to adulthood and equip him to care well for himself as well.
Source: Psychological Issues Faced By Adopted Children, Dr. Tali Shenfield, Advanced Psychology, November 11, 2017, https://www.psy-ed.com/wpblog/psychological-issues-adopted-children/